Monday, January 18, 2010

FCH 1990-1994

Once upon a time, I had two sons, 
Forrest Cullen Hallmark and Bryce Carlson Hallmark
They were happy guys.
In 1994, they died in a car accident.

Today, January 18th, 2010, would have been Forrest's 20th birthday.

I feel the need to share photos of him to honor his short, but
incredibly happy and full little life.

Forrest at age one - he thought he looked pretty dapper in this hat.
This photo always makes me smile....

Forrest was a dinosaur guy! 
This was part of his Halloween costume one year,
but he wore it ALL the time. 
He would carry a book around with him, "Pocket Guide to Dinosaurs"
and correct other people's pronunciations and give them important 
facts about dinosaurs.
He might have been a paleontologist one day....

He loved these jammies! They were his favorites and he wore them long after they fit him.
I love this picture of the two of us.....

This is one of my very favorite photos of Forrest.
It was taken the week before he died.
We were hiking up Aspen Vista with Cullen and Bryce, 
my niece Leila, my mom and dad and me.
It was Father's Day and Forrest had snacks for everyone in his backpack.

His life (their lives) were too short.
I still don't know how people get through something
 like the loss of a child.
I do know that it IS one day at a time.
You learn to live in the moment and appreciate every, little thing.
And you cry......a lot......

 Forrest, I wish you a Happy Twentieth Birthday today, 
even though you are not here to celebrate it.
We all love and miss you,
but you will always live in our hearts


  1. Sending you a huge hug and more love than you can imagine my dear friend. You teach us all how to live. It's a gift everyone lucky enough to have you in their life cherishes. I'll be smiling and thinking about you and Forrest today (and yes a few tears too!) xo Kathy

  2. Oh, Cuz, these pictures are so beautiful. Oh my. Here is a long and heartfelt hug from me too. That last picture of Forrest, with those sturdy legs, looking so resolute... really touches my heart especially. We send our love from Eugene Oregon.

  3. My thoughts are with you today.
    I can't even begin to imagine...


  4. Jone,

    What beutiful boys. My heart goes out to you, I have no words to express what my heart feels when I read your words and look at your boys, just sending you hugs and lots of love.

  5. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.... My deepest feeling is that they're o.k. it's not far,, the distance from your house and heart to where they are. just right there. life is beautiful and you show us that. all of us. never take anything for granted. enjoy every minute. that's your lesson to me. so thank you so much for that.

  6. thank you ALL for your comments.
    we got through the day, and the week is still a little "heavy"...
    but, onward through the "snow"....
    it will be a clear day tomorrow.


  7. jone my dear dear lovely are such a huge inspiration to me...actually you are on my hero list...did i ever tell you? no matter, it is true for me...your love, talent & strength are ever a reminder to me of how to live each day.
    thank you for sharing Forrest's birthday with us...and next year we will raise our glasses, a toast to 21 years. PeAcE to you every day. xoxoxox deirdre

  8. Dear Jone!
    Deirdre wrote that you are on her hero list...
    You´re on my list too!
    Lots of love to you and your family

  9. Just found your blog, and I wanted to tell you that you are amazing . . . creating, designing, blogging, and still putting one foot in front of the other foot as you honor another year of your sweet boys' being gone.

  10. dear Jone,
    so amazing to see those exquisite little faces peeping out from your blog. It never fails to amaze me how you with the most sadness that any person could carry around with them could be the most loving in return.....
    I feel privileged to know you and to hear about Forrest and Bryce...

  11. Beautiful boys Jone. Thanks for sharing some of Forrest with us. A heart warmer type of guy. Best to you. xxoo, Taylor

  12. Jone- I got lost for a while in "blog land" and realized I had not looked at your personal one for quite a while. I am so glad that I did....I feel like my guardian angel was nudging the mouse to click on you dear one! Oh..... my heart feels so much for you dear friend. As we deepen our friendship, I will learn more about you and how you put the pieces of your life back together, on a daily basis. Your photos and shared special memories of your precious boys were amazing. And then to imagine Forrest as a 20 year full of pain and wonder. You are an amazing person and how lucky am I that our lives crossed in France. Take good care my sweet friend.
    LOVE- your Oolie

  13. Jone, I remember you. I remember your beautiful boys. I am Von's daughter.

    I lost my daughter Nicole Johnson (you might remember her) on June 10, 2009.


  14. Hi Jone - I was browsing your blog. I think because of papier mache. We lost my nephew 7 years ago. As you know, it was awful. The light went out in my brother's eyes. It's been coming back, but it is so hard. Your lovely post gives me hope. Thank you, and I would love to see more posts on your sons.